My nerves are frayed

Dear Family and Friends,

This has been a most unusual month for the China adoption community. VERY limited in the rumor department - the only thing that is reasonably sure is that the CCAA will get through November 30, 2005 dossiers.

If that holds true it would be extremely disappointing since the last processed date (November 25) was a Friday in 2005 and that means 2 days, of the currently anticipated 5 total, would include a weekend! Very discouraging. I know I told all of you not to get your hopes up for an October referral, but I'll admit I was so hoping for it myself. But, God knows what He's doing and I take comfort in that.

The next few days will be torture. Waiting for either the CCAA website to update or for the rumor boards to pick up on who will be included or even if the CCAA sent out referrals at all, is a nail-biter. If the CCAA didn't mail them out already, then it will be another 2 weeks before we hear anything - China has a national holiday this coming week. Unlike most countries, when China has a national holiday, it's not just for one day, it's the whole week!

Oh well. Time to get ready for church.....

Blessings,

Chinamom

Another weekend down...

Dear Family and Friends,

I wish I had some good news but I'm afraid there is still no news at all! I've never seen it get so close to referrals and there not be any rumors at all about what dates might be included! I hope this is a GOOD sign, but can't be sure about that.

I'll post again as soon as there is an inkling of news....

Blessings,

Chinamom

Unusually quiet

Dear Family and Friend,

It has been unusually quiet on the rumor front this month. I don't know what to make of this - I'm hoping it's because the CCAA workers are busy as bees and can't take time to talk to their adoption agencies and that they are matching many days worth of LID's! There is a Chinese holiday at the end of the month which will close their offices for several days so the thought is that they will try to get their packets of referrals out by the end of next week!!!!

Last evening I had a visit with my social worker to do my LAST update of my home study (this is my second update during this wait!). It was odd talking about post placement visits when I still don't have a referral! But, it makes everything real all of a sudden. Thanks to my sister Terry, to Tricia, Michelle and Nannette for writing references!

I'll let you all know what happens as the rumors start coming in....

Blessings,

Chinamom

Keeping busy

Dear Family and Friends,

It's the middle of the month. That is always a difficult time when your waiting for news. The excitement of referrals from the beginning of the month is over and it's too early for the next group of rumors that might give some suggestion of how far the CCAA will get for the next batch of referrals.

I've tried to keep busy. I continue to clean and organize my home. It is so easy to collect things you would normally not keep when you have a bit of room. I've found this to be the case over the last five years since moving to this apartment. It certainly should be big enough for one adult and one child, however it seems to get smaller on a daily basis as more baby things are collected. Today I staring sorting out old school books that I haven't looked at in nearly 10 years - time to get rid of them!

Anybody want some old law school books??

Blessings,

Chinamom

"Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the LORD." Psalm27:14

Remembering....

Dear Family and Friends,

This week I was writing to a woman from my adoption agency's Yahoo group who was discouraged by the ever lengthening wait, and I relayed the story of my son, Adam LinXiang.

I think of him often. Usually at the very beginning or end of the day. That's because with the time difference, he is likely going to bed when I'm leaving for work, or will be getting up to start his busy day just as I'm winding down from mine.

I wonder what he is doing. How is he growing? Is he well? Does he have parents who know Christ as Savior?

He is 3 1/2 years old now. Talking. Walking. A little man.

I am still amazed that I could have fallen so in love with little more than a picture that I held close to my heart for 9 months. Amazed at how I'm still brought to tears at the knowledge that I will not hold my little boy in my arms.

I know the Lord is watching over him and my prayer for Adam is that one day I will see him in Heaven. My little boy - a man who feared the Lord and had an intimate relationship with the Savior.

Blessings,
Chinamom

Referrals are in for September

Dear Family and Friends,

The results are in..... The CCAA has processed a total of 4 days worth of referrals in the last month. We are now up through 11/25/05. Ten more days of paperwork to get through.

Although I had expected something like this, given the large numbers of people logged in for those dates, I'm still a bit disheartened. I do so want to be to China and back by the end of this year - now that is tenuous at best.

I covet your prayers that God will give me that extra measure of grace to get through the next few months.

Blessings,
Chinamom